Breaking free

I did my best to stay calm, friendly and to answer their questions without enthusiasm. I don´t want to be rude in any way. I know the answers to their questions. It was the same questions I was told to ask people as a child. My step dad, aka the meanest person I ever met, was a priest among them. (They don´t call it priests, but that´s what it is.) It´s not like I think all Jehovah´s Witnesses have serious drinking problems and beats their wife´s and children like he did. I´m sure the two ladies that came to my door today had only good intentions BUT it is a cult.

I spent many years of my life trying to break free from them. My “childhood friends” doesn´t talk to me anymore because I choose to not be a part of their cult. That´s all according to their rules. (Some other rules are: don´t celebrate any holidays, don´t have friends that aren´t Jehovah´s Witnesses, don´t take blood transfusions, don´t ask questions..) I knew that before I left them. I actually tried to leave as a teenager but missed my friends so much so I decided to “come back” for a little while and prepare myself mentally to leave them for good. I finally manage to do that after building a new network of friends outside the organization under several years. You have to be extremely strong mentally to leave an organization that continuously trying to control your mind.

I´m proud of the fact that I did manage to leave them. Many of my friends today don´t even know of this. Not because I´m ashamed of it. I moved on. I just don´t want to think or talk about all the years I lost. It brings out so many negative thoughts in my head. Days like today when they come knocking on my door I start thinking a little bit. I´m grateful for my freedom.