Thursday, February 7, 2013

Separation Anxiety


Hayley in the light of the early morning sun,
shining in through the bedroom window.


There is nothing like being a mother. It's definitely true what everybody keeps telling you before you have kids, life will never be the same again. It will never be the same! It's much better! Never the same, totally different. You sleep less, work harder AND have more magic in your life. Seeing the world through the eyes of my son and my daughter when they discover new amazing things, there's nothing that possibly could compare to that. 

Right now Hayley is having some serious separation anxiety attacks whenever she can't see me. She's OK with other people holding her and playing with her, as long as she can see me. She loves people, she always smiles and flirts with everyone she meets (just like her daddy.) I've always said yes when people wants to hold her, much more so than I did with my first born. I guess that I was a little protective with him. With Hayley I've tried hard to share her in every way I can. Still, I'm the one spending 22-24hours/day with her. She does sleep in her own room, but if she wakes up I'm there in 2sec. I believe that breastfeeding creates a very strong bond as well. I'm still breastfeeding her. Evolutionary it all makes sense. I am her comfort and the one providing food. 


Hayley 6 months old

I'm  not super stressed about it. In other cultures babies spend most of their first year/years with their Mom, barely separated at all. Yes, it would be easier if she could spend time with other people sometimes without being super upset. (She's getting more and more upset, two months ago anyone who picked her up got the biggest smile.) I've decided to just let the phase pass, slow down my life (as much as I possibly can……) and bring her along. I did that all the time until very recently. I think that she's telling me that she liked it better that way and therefor I should listen to that. I know that this will pass too. My battle method is basically to minimize the separation as much as possible until the phase passes naturally.

Any thoughts about separation anxiety and small children? I would love to hear them!



A little earlier 

8 comments:

  1. Jag led av svår separationsångest från min mamma. Eftersom jag är enda barnet och hon var litet överbeskyddande blev jag väldigt beroende av henne. Minns fortfarande den dagen i lekskolan när hon skulle gå därifrån en liten stund och jag blev helt otröstlig. Det gick över men det var jobbigt. Jag har ju inga egna barn men tror nog att det bästa är att släppa taget litet allteftersom. Hayley är ju fortfarande en baby så det är säkert inte konstigt att hon känner som hon gör. Du verkar vara en så klok person så det kommer nog gå väldigt bra även med denna fas. :)
    Vilka färger i sista fotot! Var det verkligen så rosa eller har du använt Photoshop? Kram!!

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    1. Jag är övertygad om att du har rätt, släppa taget lite eftersom. Behöver ju inte gå så snabbt när hon är så liten och jag faktiskt kan jobba hemma :) Det är rätt skönt att inte behōva lämna henne.

      Tack! Det var så rosa, jag har inte ens installerat photoshop på min nya dator.

      Kram

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  2. It's a phase that will pass -- I promise -- and will replaced by something else that will make you equally anxious for awhile. My daughter is 16 now, nearly 17. And when I look back at the things that used to make me crazy!!!!! She and you will be fine.... I'm visiting from the blog hop. Stop by www.pushingonarope.com for a glimpse of what the future of parenting has in store for you! ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Terri!!

      I visited your blog, and I love it! Good content, clean and so good looking! I might ask you for design advices later on. Looking forward to follow you.

      Delete
  3. I think you are doing the right thing by listening to your gut. I love all your pictures! Stopping by to say Hi from MeloMomma's blog hop.
    Have a great day!

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    1. Thank you so much Linda! Your feedback means a lot!

      You have a beautiful blog, with a very important content. Looking forward to learn from you :)

      ~Maria

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    ReplyDelete
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    1. I'm glad to hear that :)
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